The Journal


Serving the Metropolitan Area


Since 1872



February 26th




By Jack Parnell - retired Congressman and Independent Presidential candidate


Syndicated by Acme Features


"I’ve always rather admired the Chinese.  I suppose that’s because most of them are so far away."

                   -Charles Bukowski (1982)


"When the duck drops, say the magic word and win a hundred dollars!"

                                                - Groucho Marx (symbolism being cheaper in the 50's)


          Carl Sagan and Jodie Foster got their "Contact" wrong... warn't Hitler's speechifying that kicked off our televised Symbolic Age but good ol' Philo T. Farnsworth, out of Beaver, Utah, throwing sixty seconds' broadcast of a good ol’ US dollar sign which... even flying out at light-speed, had made it only halfway to Proxima Centauri two years later before losing a lot of credibility, back there in 1929.

          Symbols make us sit up, clap, weep, slobber like Pavlov dogs (or bark, like Hillary Clinton), salute... and vote! Remember Willie Horton, Nixon's bad shave and that little girl picking flowers when Goldwater's nuke went off? That rat-puke Georgia cracker flashing doctored pictures of one-arm, no-legs veteran Max Cleland with Saddam and Osama to get elected in that session between the older Bush brother tending towards proximity to Confederate flags to out-nword John McCain and America's 911-inspired homosexual marriage panic four years after, simultaneous to Dubya sellin' off our port security to Dubai while Johnno was reduced to crawling to the Christers for forgiveness – so’s he could get his ass whipped, next time out, by the Urban Spaceman?  Who then sold America down the river to Spook Central, to be replaced by the man with funny hair told us how much he loves poorly educated Americans and Hillary barked until Mister Trump turned into President Trump as a consequence of Russia fomenting those Halloween FBI e-mail attacks in order to get their boy elected, then indicted… seven times!... as a consequence of all the blowback from Ukrainian billionaires?  


          Orientalism, that’s what I call it!, sibilant symbolism - missing only carpets, pointy slippers and eunuchs (hopefully unmarried) slithering about with daggers behind damask curtains of dragons breathing opium fire. Maybe some wicker furniture, a peacock or two, some Danish cartoons and a can of gasoline. Disasters waiting to happen.

          "It isn't important that the words mean anything," counsels advertising man Tim Mayfield, an expert at devising so called "Japlish" to sell cars and electronics. "The important thing is that they sound good."

          Morty Scow, that California Congressman as displays Catfishist tendencies now and again, calls it Glyphic Thinking. GT simmers underneath the crust of Western reason like a vein of Aztec gold (or Juarez sewage, if you will), surfacing on the wrong side of the border wall against which hot-button issues are pressed... law and order, values, virtues, "the children" and the such.  And, of course, those people…

          Law and order's halfway glyphic already, being as some of those entrusted with homeland security have strolled beyond catching homeland robbers and killers to prognosticating thoughtcrimes. Mr. James Quinn Wilson's theory of broken windows makes the sense to some... if you prohibit broken windows, public urination, panhandling, graffiti, as the theory goes, Scott Peterson, Martha Stewart and the Sandusky Strangler will take their business elsewhere.

          Symbolism, strained through the New Frontier of Contempt, breeds such chaining... employment of one despicable characteristic to despicabalize another, tangential trait, property or person. Back in Gold Rush San Francisco, there was this politician Denis Kearny, famous for blaming everything on the Chinese... attaching riders to kick out the damn Chinese to every scrap of legislation he could get his paws on. It would seem even Orientals are not immune from round-eyes whose Oriental thinking runs to strings of chained ideographs.

          Back to the Quinnster - one of his poodles, John Leo, set some sort of record for chaining homelessness with crime back in the last century: "the plight of beggars and the homeless"... "80% of city residents felt that begging and homelessness were serious, pervasive problems on the subway"... "Get the homeless and beggars out of the subway" and so on until the final absurdity "69 percent of Americans think the homeless should not be allowed to panhandle." The gentlemen Leo and Wilson knew, very well, that not all homeless panhandle, not all beggars are homeless, and most of those polled resent being panhandled (or robbed or raped) by anybody... whether the perps reside on park benches, on Central Park West, in a Mexican slum or in Washington lobbyist’s offices. But who gives a rat's ass about truth when there's an opportunity to score points against a despised population, especially one as seldom votes and retards property values! And doesn’t yet have The Bomb.  (Therefore, these days, the Costa Ricans).

          Symbolic GT engenders reverse-chaining, too... the FBI having squandered thirty years and thousands upon thousands of dollars trying to prove Groucho Marx was a Commie mastermind, not to mention Dick Nixon's obsession with John Lennon! Liberal Squeamish countered with litigation against the "Lion King" hyenas as racial stereotypes (giving The Donald some of his best glyphic doubletalk… Lyin’ Ted, Lyin’Hillary and so on… or "Forrest Gump", as defames the mentally challenged, and have forced public schools to stop publicizing honor rolls as insensitive to the communities of sloth and stupidity.  And now we got the squeamish mobilizing to ban this cartoon movie on account of it making fun of allergies.

          "It is important to be sensitive," one authority waffled during the "Lion King" fiasco, "...however, at some point, sensitivity gives way to paranoia."  I do not mean to imply that Cecil, the Lion King’s assassin, was “sensitive” but, since the Hunger Games, bows and arrows are considered rather cool, in a Nativist American Way, although that’s probably racist, too, and deserving of a lawsuit by… somebody…

          That litigation! Why shouldn't parents of those kids killed by this nut down in San Diego, as took out twenty-one junk food junkies and wounded several more, sue the company? "Basically, McDonald's should have had some type of security guard on the premises since they had knowledge of various criminal activity that occurred in that area in the last several years," pontificated the plaintiffs' lawyer, James Frantz.

          Well, there was a security guard on the premises... James Oliver Huberty, in fact… the perpetrator!

          "Though America has major, long-term crime problems, the public understanding of crime is clouded by politically and commercially powered fantasy," wrote Katherine Dunn, a reviewer of "The Mythology of Crime and Criminal Justice" by Victor Kappeler and Gary Potter, coupla homeboys out at East Kay Why.

          Potter and Kappeler say politics and media focus on failure... the more epic and spectacular the better... because disaster heightens ratings and the stock of oil companies, gets people out to vote and give money. "Failure breeds scary stories, which produce fear... failure feeds political campaigns and spawns social-work programs," they say, "...failure is where the money is." (my emphasis)

          Now I don’t cotton to schoolhouse killers, and burned my NRA card after their board voted to arm known terrorists as are already on the “no fly” list, but the gun lady on television over the weekend does have some credibility in assigning the culpability for mass mayhem to the media.  Not that the victims and survivors of Palmdale were professional actors spouting fake blood and paid off by somebody… George Soros, maybe, or Hillary or Obama, but she does have a point that “crying white mothers” jack up ratings for the “legacy” media, whatever that is.

          Brings me back to Morty's discussion of the GT which... if you read up on science, represents one sort of step backwards into old-fashioned ways of seeing the dragon whole, then trying to focus in on more relative parts, rather than receiving information all chopped up digitally, like on letters of the Western alphabets, CDs and DVDs as reduce real time to pixels and those new TV sets from Prague we have to buy because the cable companies got together to change transmission standards, making junk of all our perfectly good old TVs from Japan which stopped working just a’fore Superbowl Sunday, that year.

          There's no question digital thinking's more faster, efficient and "with it"... as many paid-off foundation thinkers will write books about, to tell you. Symbolism, however, comforts... it takes a load off the mind to point, click and believe as this poll found that 42% of Republicans and 17% of Democrats believe that any news with which they personally disagree has to be fake… a conspiracy. The trouble with digital thinking is that rigidity it imposes which becomes, at an extreme, foundation for all sorts of unpleasant philosophies, as contribute to worldwide moral decline and even, in semi-Communist Vietnam, devaluation of the dong. (Calm yourselves, that's what they call their money, over there!)

          What do you expect from a population that’s gobbling up remakes of “The X-files” and “Twin Peaks” not to mention all those new shows, videogames and movies as portray Americans as clueless colluders with the Deep State conspirators, the Russians and all those aliens as came down from the sky, not over the Mexican and Canadian borders.

          And Philo Farnworth's glyph keeps on soaring out, waiting for some distant culture of little green squids to haul it down with positronic telescopes and so, by symbol, begin to understand the nature of them as run that angry little blue planet, third out from that otherwise unremarkable yellow star.  It crossed the path of that Trappist dwarf star ‘round eleven twenty-two sixty-three, giving any inhabitants of its seven habitable planets time enough to get back to us.  Then, maybe, take action...

          Anyone up for Sheriff Joe’s cameo in "War of the Worlds III" - as is goin' straight to cable and the little red vending boxes, that one as replaced the Scientologist with Seth Rogan… or was it James Franco?  (Never have figured out the difference a’tween those two!)