The Journal


Serving the Metropolitan Area


Since 1872


October 8th




By Jack Parnell - retired Congressman and Independent Presidential candidate


Syndicated by Acme Features


          A hundred years ago, so it's been said, Nazi Germany's foundations were laid in Russia where some bad Czarists... abetted by other Continentals, some Englishmen and (maybe) Americans, too… drafted and circulated a manifesto allegedly authored by the nascent Zionist movement over there, the infamous "Protocols of the Elders of Zion".

          These Protocols were fake news before the term was coined - but one line from the forgery sticks in my memory... that double-fanged means of control exerted by a conspiratorial elite against trusting civilians since the Roman Empire and, probably, long before... loosely translated as force and make-believe.

          Force we have always with us (otherwise America would belong to the Commies today, or the Nazis, or the Brits or Indians); as for "make believe", these few considerations upon how a use of language, symbolism and spectacle converge… in a post-achievement economy of entitlements, after work disappears… become significant. Don't help, either, that some in the overclass are just plain dumb - like them as survived the Hardee's/KFC merger and thereupon made the decision to merge their spokesicons, too; Dr. Angus and Colonel Sanders. Coulda settled upon Dr. Sanders, but they didn't, and... thereby... created, for themselves, awhile, a problem.  Doesn’t help that they’re still running through broke Saturday Night Live retreads and transgender country singers either.

          Now when the word "problem" (as relates to missing children and terror; also hunger, crime, mosquitoes, marketing malfunctions and the such) loses its juice, we begin bein’ told everything under the sun is “at risk”, then seeing "outbreaks of epidemics," as noted Eric Zorn of the Chicago Tribune. A medical term was widened to encompass cocaine use, date rape, dropouts, media violence, global warming, anything bad... in fact... agin' which somebody "thinks the public ought to pay more attention," the operative word, of course, being “pay”.

          Overuse of "epidemic" vernacular as led to "...misunderstandings, unsubstantiated fears and, eventually," warned Ward Cates of the CDC, "a lack of attention" generated an upgrade of media alarm to the more prosaic and even less discriminating "pandemics" of gun violence, head lice and teenage obesity.

          "Changing and controlling language is one of the ways marginalized people change and control the way they are seen by the mainstream," admits columnist Leonard Pitts, who, after a long career of having dealt full hands of race cards, was prairie-fired off'n his job over having written "AIDS victim" instead of "person with AIDS". "People of good will (emphasis added to differentiate from Ms. Johnson's better community) ought to empathize."

          The liberals’ buzzword of the hour, next to “microaggression” of course, is “cultural Marxism” which is, I suppose, a sort of Communism as perpetuates and aggravates class inequality, but gives the New-New Leftists something to celebrate during their impotent denouncings of every aspect of political incorrectness from twitchy college Deans to Paula Deen to them duck-hunting fellows on the cable.  It’s a win-win situation… the CMs (who long ago made peace with the economic inconsistencies of securing niche jobs for themselves in universities, foundations and community organizations as were financed on the wills of robber barons like Guggenheims, Fords and Rockefellers on an unspoken promise that they could shout and screech all they wished, so long as they never did anything) get the illusion of potency and importancy whenever they can shoot down some snarky college journalist or a supermodel accused of fat-shaming by example, while the “conservative” economic fatcats get a free pass to continue dipping into the pockets of the public, and the government, by advancing their policies of crony capitalism.

          Used to think conservatives were them as paid their bills on time, fightin' for industry and agin' liberals who, George Gilder alleges, hate competition, as "wastes resources in an entropic world." No argument there… no less an un-cultural un-Marxist than Karl’s ghostwriter Friedrich Engels hailed the American imperative towards monopoly as the penultimate step before dictatorship of the proletariat.  Then the Bush Supremes upheld the renomenclature of campaign bribery as “free speech” in Citizens United and that claim by Amway that a major GOP donor owned the trademark to "freedom fuel" as a gasoline additive.

          Remember: when a patriot or lawyer, now, uses the xenomenclature to bellow: "Freedom is not free!", it's your freedom, not his, in the crosshairs. Not without payment of royalties to Daniel Ortega, being as them t-shirts are now manufactured in his Nicaragua!

          Mona Charen blames "counterculture types who opposed the war in Vietnam" for the sorry state of NASA today. Warn't pilferin' pennies on rubber o-rings and heat-shield tiles as fall off when hit by wads of foam as retarded Mars Explorations and kept us off Jupiter... where Stanley Kubrick and Art C. Clarke predicted we'd have been to and back already... but shadowy traitors and red Depends geezers as "instructed us that pride was a sin, especially in a nation that could conduct such a war." Suck on that, Dante Aligheri!  Also, youse various French intellectuals and the Strawberry Alarm Clock...

          And dumb bottom-feeders, like myself, thinking, all along, the latest budget problems resulted from Congress repealin' those old Star Wars treaties to deploy Sith missiles against those damn Somalis... well, they actually didn't repeal 'em so much as, in the words of Honorable Maureen Kittridge, borrowed from Hollywood, put 'em on hiatus.

          Patriots, running in place like rats on wheels, must dredge up new lingo to replace old euphemisms like "ethnic cleansing", as lose their euphemisticity over time the way gay marriage dropped off the radar following that bureaucrat in Kentucky as got put in her place (but at least got to meet the Pope)… replaced by Mexican gardeners and hooker-overpaying Governors, stage right as opposed to dirty old Senators in airport restrooms, stage left... then by missing birth certificates and now, it seems, by a buncha e-mails from the former Democratic nominee-designate, none of which appear to imply a threesome with Bill and the dead guy in Benghazi or Anthony Weiner and his wife, or Yoko Ono and nnumerable foundation donors as populate the Panama Papers.  "We are being asked to be patriots and to obey," the former Presidential candidate and Governor Pete duPont rationalized certain provisions of the Patriot Act, as were supposed to sunset but, of course, didn't. Exercising his privilege of all cunning linguistics, "Pete" had dropped his birth name, "Pierre" like a hot crepe, as soon as all things French became, and until that disco shooting, remained tantamount to treason... French nationalists inveighing against American slang and passing reataliatory laws dictating that there would be no more hot dogs; they'll heretoafter be called "chiens chaud" under penalty of law.

          Hotdogging Entropians, with their hand-dandy chadly-handling spin-doctors, have so lowered the bar that, say Stephen Ansolabehere and Shanto Iyengar in the book "Going Negative", a "demoralized electorate" comes to expect incompetence, scapegoating and corruption and, maybe, even desire it as psychologically comforting. Thus, all them 2000 subliminals flashing the word "DEMOCRATS" shrunk down to "RATS" (as Joe Lieberman called "strange and disappointing") escalated into 2004's Swift-boaters as simultaneously blasted Pickle John Kerry as a coward and psychotic murderer, then those endless nutcase preacher soundbites, mental hospital shadows and Obama/O.J. morphing after oh-eight as caused the best Republican President since Bill Clinton to spend most of his second term hiding in some closet with insurance men.  These aren’t lies, remember, they’re alt-facts.  And then we’re supposed to feign outrage over the Russians buying and running right-wing negative advertising on the social media sites?

          (Or is it the Russians?  According to Mike Pence, it’s the Chinese as have the hate on for President Trump and his Moscophiliac golden showers leading to the inescapable conclusion that the real puppetmasters of American elections are… for the Democrats… Mister Mao’s disinterred legions versus… on the Republican side… Mad Vlad and his nest of red sparrows.)

          "Only way to hit a triple," shrugged California Democratic campaign consultant Richie Ross, after implicating his man's rival in the molestation murder of little Polly Klass, "is to get close to the foul line."

          Once "cognitariat" (say those Z-stringin' Tofflers, a few of them maybe even “woke”) displace "proletariats", some of us'll enjoy a wonderful future of more cans than a pay-per-pound recycling outfit hard by Skid Row... we can clean up pollution, can educate the world's billions digitally, can even provide meaningful work for all. But they, too, finally admit the likelihood of force - when make-believe collapses of its own ponderousness and Americans, weary of their politicians, media and squawking lobbies, opt for Oswald Spengler's "noble aimlessness" under military rule.

          But is it our destiny to play Mussolini’s Italy as junior partner to the Cossacks or Celestials?

          After thumbing through "Going Negative", I lost faith in public campaign financing for the big parties, Tweedle n' Dumbo. Preserving a national dialogue, let alone the nation, won't be accomplished by maintaining sick elephants and crippled (or should I say “mobility challenged”) donkeys on life support... it's time to take up the pillows and smother the both daid!

          After leaving the Reagan cabinet, JimmyWatt... as sold off public lands to mining and ranching and timber people because Armageddon was nigh... used to make a high living giving speeches to God’s faithful D-Twenty and M-thirteeners at five grand a night because of the riots and protest that publicized his appearances. So, one night in Michigan, the professional protesters decided not to co-operate. Without all the free publicity, only ten people bought tickets for the event, and it was duly cancelled. Jimmitty, as others, had finally heard the sounds of silence... one hand clapping in a forest where nobody listens and no trees fall because they've already been cut down; rendered into Lincoln logs for kids to play with, erecting their little forts and walls for plastic cowboys, Indians, Mexicans and evangelicals to scale, being in the reconciling of force and make-believe.

          And then all them Lincoln logs get replaced by smelly plastic as discourages splinters and their hot-doggin' Lincoln Lawyers, steps taken in the interests of the children!